From Laurence White's column in tonight's Belfast Telegraph describing Culture Minister Edwin Poots' reluctance to attend Irish language events.
Due to his fear of being unable to understand what would be going on, he hasn't accepted any invitations since his appointment. Maybe simultaneous translation will have to provided - like many meetings in Wales in which speakers can tend to freely switch between English and Welsh.
But Poots has managed to attend five Ulster Scots events - conducted in English!
The Belfast Telegraph's Laurence White them delivers his killer line:
"To be fluent in Ulster-Scots all you need is a Ballymena accent and a poor grasp of spelling."
A bit unfair really on both the indigineous minority languages recognised in NI?
Update - The Ulster Scots Heritage Council got a letter printed the following evening!